“One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life …” Psalm 27:4 (NIV)

Taking the bus down to the city, I got off at Port Authority near Columbus Circle and walked to the Hearst Tower in Midtown Manhattan. I was interviewing with Seventeen magazine and saw my future span before my eyes: a hotshot editor, fresh out of college, living and working in the city of my dreams — New York City. The city I was born just outside of, where both my parents once worked and fulfilled their dreams.

But the dream quickly died, all those years ago, when my older brother’s caregiver of four years suddenly quit. She handed in her letter, saying it was simply time to call it in. And just like that, I laid down my dream and became my brother’s caregiver.

In time, that turned out to be the most magical, satisfying season of my life. But at first? Having given up my dream, I felt broken and jaded.

How do we look out over the expanse of our lives and admit the dreams that have died? How do we unearth purpose when the path behind us and before us is painted over with pain — when jobs don’t work out, when our children’s choices pan out differently than we’d hoped, when marriages crash and burn, and when prayers go unanswered?

In this season, even in this new year, as I find myself encountering (yet again) more dreams dying than I can count, I can’t help but dwell on this Bible verse:

“One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life …” (Psalm 27:4).

The truth is, dead dreams bring redirections into our lives, but there is no gamble in going to God. Even when dreams die, life takes us on detours, and longings turn into losses, with Him there are no chances, no risks that He will fail. He will always come through, even when dreams don’t come true.

I cannot tell you that all your dreams will eventually come true, nor can I tell you that you should cling to every dream until the very end. What I can tell you, though, is that you can cling to Jesus. Even in this new year, come what will — though many dreams and needs and desires pull at our hearts — may He ever be the One we seek above all others. The One we trust will always satisfy.

God, in Your presence, there is safety to grieve all that we give up. In Your presence, there is space to let tears fall. Hold us even as we leave jobs jaded. Guide us even as dreams go on being deferred. Lead us to long always and only for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Adapted from Rachel’s new book, The Matter of Little Losses: Finding Grace to Grieve the Big (and Small) Things.

OUR FAVORITE THINGS

Find grace to grieve your losses with Rachel Marie Kang’s new book, The Matter of Little Losses, which releases February 6, 2024. When you preorder the book by February 6, you can claim the audiobook and Lent devotions for free. Click here for more details.

ENGAGE

Find hope and help for life’s losses and hard seasons when you connect with Rachel Marie Kang on Instagram. Her website is rachelmariekang.com.

FOR DEEPER STUDY

Isaiah 49:23, “… Then you will know that I am the LORD; those who hope in me will not be disappointed” (NIV).

Despite the things you’ve dreamed of and lost, what is helping you keep your gaze upon the beauty of the Lord? Nature? Family? Friends? Simple pleasures? We’re always here to hear your heart — come and share your thoughts in the comments.

© 2024 by Rachel Marie Kang. All rights reserved.